We're on the train to Paris!!! Should almost be there, and talk of kids, x-husbands, family members, and backsliding brings back the thoughts of home.
[Got interrupted ... continued at the train station]
It's funny how just yesterday Sis. Debbie and I were talking about how a trip like this will take your mind off things going on at home. And that's true to some extent. I've been .... myself for the first time in a long time, but the thoughts are creeping back and I just want to scream at them to GO AWAY! And yet - I can't. There they are. I wish and pray for the healing that I need so badly. And sitting here on the cold floor of the train station in Pairs, France waiting (for 2 hours now) for our tour guide - I feel that blanket of sadness coming down. I feel the tears that I so long to cry creeping up only to be pushed down again. I really wish someone could just know and understand and speak into my soul words to soothe and mend. That's been my prayer for 26 long years - hasn't happened yet. ha! I'm at the point where either something changes - or I spend the rest of my life on this emotional roller coaster. I don't think I can take the motion sickness too much longer *sigh* Enough for now - I'll be bawling here for no reason. You know.... puke in London... have an emotional breakdown in Paris - whatever. All in a good vacation.
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